Fear, fear, does it remind you something uncomfortable, spiders, heights, public speaking or walking alone. does it make your heart beat faster, hands sweaty, legs wobbly? it is completely fine beacuse each one of us has our own fears. its a very common yet settled emotion. one thing is no fear is trivial to the fearful mind. but as it is classicaly said, “the thing to fear most is fear itself”. facing your worst fears is not an easy task, we all agree. hence here are some steps i hope can help you dismantle it gradually.
- Identify your fear
awareness is an important step towards any change. try to identify what frightens you. often the panic when faced with fear makes it all a blur , to know what caused it among many things. try to notice what specifically are you afraid of.
- Create your fear file
write all your fears down and make list or as i like to call it a fear file. remember recording any trivial thing that makes you uncomfortable or something you always wanted to do but never had the courage. it can be asking someone for a dance to just slicing a fruit down. don’t be shy because you are the only one who would see it.
- Face them one by one
i know it sounds like jumping off a cliff all of a sudeen. and you know that you have to face it. it is the only way, “do the thing we fear, and the death of fear is certain”-emerson. we can do somethings to make this face off a little less scary.
- start with something you are least uncomfortable with– small victories boost your confidence greatly.
- start step by step- if you are scared of singing a song, start by singing a line, just a line.
- mentally picturize it- picturizing yourself in the situation you dread will make you more familiar with it. it significantly reduces your reactions when actually facing your fear.
- calm your inner child- your inner child is who carries all your trauma, all impressions of rejections, denials and is afraid. calm it by saying soothing words, whatever suits you best. for example, “all is well”, “nothing will harm you”, “i’m proud of myself”,etc. self affirmations are said to work wonders.
- Surround yourself with positive people
people who would encourage you, support you, and give positive feedbacks. these are empowering for the psych. stay away from positivity vampires.
- Keep repeating
keep doing all these things again and again until you let go of your fear. keep repeating as douglas horton said, “action cures fear, inaction creates terror”. you will win for sure. remember to cross every fear from the list once you triumph over it.
- Don’t hesitate to update your list
never hesitate to acknowledge any new fear that comes your way. “one of the greatest discoveries a man makes, one of his great surprises, is to find he can do what he was afraid he couldn’t do”- henry ford.
Do what suits you best. it helped me and hope it can help you too. there is something i wrote about my fear,click here, give it a read , sharing make us strong. let me know about how you cope with your fear in the comments.